!@#$% … Swears like a trooper

From the get-go it is only fair I confess … I swear.  I have a potty mouth. I pick and choose (obviously) when I ‘m going to blaspheme.  To pretend that I’m an angel that doesn’t swear would be a big fat lie.

As a teacher, I do not swear in the classroom.  For obvious reasons.  I’m the adult that is having a positive influence.  I am the role model. Though that doesn’t stop my little cherubs from throwing some pretty colourful language out there.

As a Mum, I again, try to be that positive role model. My kids aren’t silly, they know better – Mum is no better than the next person. She swears like a trooper!

What does that even mean? Where did that expression even come from? Well, after a quick Google check … “swear like a trooper (uk) to use a lot of offensive language.  He was extremely drunk and swearing like a trooper”.

Makes me sound like a right gem!  To be clear, I’m not drunk while I write this.

I guess I wanted to warn those that are spending time reading my blogs, in up and coming posts, I may use a swear word or two. I don’t want to be judged and yet I guess I will be. It’s hard to explain why I swear –  for emphasis, to add emotion, pure laziness – but I do. My Mum introduced me to some right doozies as a youngster. Some of them stuck! If there was anyone that “swore like a trooper”, it’s my Mum, and she’s proud! It’s second nature … every second word … inhaling and exhaling bad language.

I wanted to share a little something. Something that my mother thought would be hilarious to teach all her grandchildren. Just a quick word here; we are Catholic, my children are all baptised and confirmed Catholics. I had tried to provide a good spiritual foundation for all the children. My Mum was also baptised and confirmed and also provided with a strong  Catholic foundation. From a young age Mum ran in the opposite direction though and has continued to do so.  Her contribution to the grandchildren’s upbringing: “I’m a little Catholic, I don’t swear. Bloody, bitch bastard, I don’t care”.  Harmless, but that was just the beginning. She doesn’t hold back. Not for anyone. Half the time I don’t even think she realises she is swearing. Every second word is fuck, bitch or bastard … quite popular in our household as well.

There is one cussing word that I absolutely cannot stand and will not tolerate. The kids know it and anyone that knows me well, knows it. It is vile and vulgar, repulsive and unpleasant. If I was to ever use the word to describe another human being, they must have done the absolute worst possible thing to me. I would never use the word lightly. Those that do use it in my presence … God help them!  Starts with a C and rhymes with bunt. I don’t even want to write it down. So to be clear, I won’t be using “that” word in any of my blogs, unless I’m quoting someone. Even then, I’ll never write the full word. So many other words in our rich English language …

Swearing … because “gosh darn” and “boogerhead” just don’t cover it! (Unsupervised Mom).


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